Monday, August 20, 2007

He Can Has Grammar?

We went to the county fair over the weekend. It was everything I expected it to be: ridiculously expensive, food that smells 1203972634x better than it tastes, rides that look like fantastically painted death traps, and teeming with unwashed masses.

Totally a blast!

The Monkey rode on a bunch of the rides. I rode on...well, not enough to justify the 20 bones I dropped on a bracelet. MrR bought bottles of water from just about every vendor there (and noted that the prices were never the same). We ate fried oreos. The child-sized elephant ride made me more dizzy than the Flying Bobs. It was, pretty much, a corn dog shy of the whole enchilada.

One of the carney acts (complete with pre-recorded barker) was Samson, the Gentle's largest horse...weighs 2700 lbs...bigger than a monster truck....only $1 folks, come on in! I had this flashback to a fair I'd been to back in MO where they had the "world's largest rat" on display...and for $0.50 you could peek through into his pen and gawk at him. I shelled out my quarters and spied a fairly rotund ground hog rooting around in some hay behind the boards.

I could see how they'd fake it with a "rat"...but a horse? This I had to see.

Well, I don't want to give too much away in case you happen to come across Samson at some future event, but let's chalk it up to a case of exaggerated advertising. He was a big horse, no doubt...but I'm fairly certain he couldn't take on a monster truck and win.

I thought about snapping a picture with the Monkey and the, uh, Gentle Giant (who was staring benignly at the back wall of the if to say, "oh, don't mind me...I'll just be standing here...humiliated....while you people pay good money to stare at my ass"). I started to sit the little guy up on the railing and he squealed "Noooooo, Mommy!!! I don't want to get eated!!"

My kid speaks lolcat. Now that was worth the buck admission!


towwas said...

Oh god, I just had this conversation about the giant horse at dinner on Monday - S.Ball and her fiance had just been to the fair and looked at the world's largest horse and, yeah, it's just a big horse. A few years ago J.Chu and I looked at the world's largest cow, and you know what? It's just a big cow. Or bull. I forget.

BASSO said...

...not being that hip or cool, I was not familiar with the Big Horse or "lolcat" - now i r