It's tripe.
No...wait. It's tripe served cold.
No...actually. It's tripe served cold with fish sauce.
Yeah. It's that.
So why is it that I can't seem to change the station when Fergie's "music" comes on? It's not interesting. It's not musically challenging. The lyrics of every. single. song. are functionally the same (me...me me...I thought of a new name for girly-parts...me me me me...I'm hot but not tryin' to take your man...me me...lookit me...me me me...did I mention me?....in the VIP?...me me me...). It's....awful.
But gaaawwwd it's catchy...and it makes me want to dance...and I'm fairly certain it's liquefying parts of my brain. Please, for the love of all that is intellectual in the world, someone stage an intervention!!
11 comments:
You know I wonder this about a lot of "rappers" or "hip-hop artists". They are an extremely wealthy group of people these days. And do you know how old some of them are?? They do this stuff for YEARS! They keep making this stuff up and selling millions of records. And we keep buying them.
I like Fergie too. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. They're selling us stuff we can feel good about even if it's sucking our brains out in the process.
I do not get Fergie. I am so confused by her. She's freaky-lookin.
I particularly enjoy when my five year old starts singing along in the car "how come every time you come around my London, London bridge wanna go down? My London, London bridge wanna go down." I'll have to stop listing to 99.5 once she is old enough to understand some of the lyrics...
The Monkey was on a roll of singing "Hit me baby one more time" for awhile...because he saw it in the Robots movie. I thought it was hilarious...
...slightly less hilarious was his belting out "I don't wanna get inside your mind or your pants" --lyrics from Bowling for Soup's "Next Ex Girlfriend." We had to put the kabash on that one calling it "a grownup song" that kids weren't allowed to sing. Heh...
I only recently learned the what exactly this "london bridge" refers to, and now I think it's especially hilarious (and troubling - I'm so elderly) that it plays on the clearchannel station four times an hour.
So am I the only one who still doesn't know what this "london bridge" refers to? Apparently I need to go do some wikipedia research and find out.
...oh! Yeah, I wouldn't have guessed that. For possibly the most hilarious discussion of this "london bridge" and how, basically, Fergie is on crack, see:
http://www.avclub.com/content/node/53235
TOWWAS' innocence has been shattered. From her on out, it's all Donkeypunching and Cleveland Steamering and Dirty Sanchezing and I'm grossing myself out now.
And don't forget "Hot Carling"...which I just found out about yesterday...and got a little ill at the thought. Ew!
I never thought there would be a time when TOWWAS was more corrupt than I was. But now I guess that day has come...
Now my innocence is shattered, and I still don't know what "london bridge" refers to.
And I don't understand any of those other terms that J. Bro threw out, either. Help!
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