Crafty Drafty

One day I will write a story about the Monkey again...about how he has, in fact, learned to tie shoes...or about how he's sounding out big words like a champ...or about how his S's now more regularly face the proper direction....or maybe about how his new response to everything is that laid-back, cool-kid "sweet!"...or about how he still, left to his own devices, will appear out of nowhere sporting the most remarkable fashion statements...


I should note that on the day pictured above, it was approximately 95 degrees outside. And those are wool pants from 2 years ago...which makes them wool highwaters. He couldn't understand why I wouldn't let him go outside and surmised that it's probably because I'm mean. Except I'm not. I'll make a note to remind him of that fact....when I'm showing his girlfriend this picture on Prom Night. Bwahaha...

Tonight's topic is my "As Seen On TV" obsession of late. I'm generally opposed to both television and television-products, but the twin draft guard looked like a pretty nifty idea for the laundry room redo. The existing metal guards on the bottom of the outside door scraped the paint on the floor and I definitely needed something there to discourage the crickets...


I was pretty much ready to shell out my $10 and support the jerks who fill up way too much airtime with this crap, except that the reviews on Amazon were all over the map and leaning toward terrible. Those things which seem too good to be true, usually are...even if they're seen on TV.

Thankfully, one of the Amazon reviewers included a helpful hint about how he/she had replaced the foam innards of the ASOTV version with 3/4" pvc pipe insulation and it worked pretty well. So I figured...well, there's an idea. I found the insulation at Home Depot and picked up some underpriced upholstery fabric at G-Street and set about making my own version.

Now, the thing is this: I'm not crafty. I take very little pleasure in sewing (unlike TOWWAS)...I'm not a scrapbooker (scrapbookist?) like M.Bro...I don't do clay crafts or nifty doodles. I sing. I act. I write. The end. I say all of that so that you'll understand the gravity of the fact that I willingly took on a sewing project -- one with no plan or pattern. I just decided to do it.

Several bloodied fingers worth of puncture wounds later (I seriously need a thimble), I did it:


I'm realizing only now that the problem with this contraption is the fact that the outside material is going to get disgustingly filthy eventually. So next time, assuming there is a next time, I'll probably make one with velcro ends so that I can wash it.

Now to lay in wait to see if it actually keeps out the crickets....