Saturday, September 23, 2006

Panhandler

Another wedding superlative:

Most Hilarious Moment

MySister and HerHusband gave out gifts at the rehearsal dinner...as most couples do. There were little speeches of thanks...and a moment or two of tears as each member of the couple presented an embroidered hankie to the other's mother with the inscription: "Thank you for raising your son/daughter to be the man/woman of my dreams." Aww...

The Monkey's gift was a puzzle...and a silver plated baseball bank with an inscription honoring his ring bearing duties. It was all shiny and heavy and pre-loaded with its first quarter. The Monkey immediately recognized it as a bank and asked me for change to put in it. I had none, but my Grandmother offered him treasures from her coffers. He had a blast putting the coins in one by one and listening to them fall.

Then someone got the bright idea to egg him on. "Hey...why don't you go ask them (gesturing down to the other end of the table where the bridesmaids and their dates/husbands had gathered)...I bet they have some money." Awesome idea!!
(I didn't think he'd do it...he's normally shy around new people...) And off he went, shiny baseball bank in hand, to beg for change from the wedding party. (forehead thwack) They got a huge kick out of it...offered him checks and credit cards because they weren't packing coins. He was on the verge of asking for bank account numbers when I called him back.

He hit up Grammi and Grampi next. My mom's pockets were empty, but he hit the jackpot with dad:


I love that picture because it's early in the pitch. My dad was making him work for it. Also, it's a rare photo that catches my father in something like an amused smile. Of course, Grampi forked over everything...almost literally...


This picture is the moment Dad was trying to explain to the Monkey that the only thing left in his pocket was his good-luck charm (some kind of casing...I dunno. It's KY -- I don't ask.), a buffalo nickel, and an ancient lifesaver. The coins had officially run out.

Not to be deterred, the Monkey made a play for the lifesaver before I interjected the requisite, "Ok, Monkey, that's enough"...with that patented tone of finality that echoes a chorus of "whoop...sounds like she means it" in the brain of a 4-year-old.

My little panhandler. Ahh....the comfort of the prospect that my future in the Home may well be funded by the kindness of strangers. Eep!

2 comments:

towwas said...

Hahahahaha! The Monkey is learning so MANY useful skills!!

grrrbear said...

It sounds like he's already better at it than 99% of the panhandlers downtown. All he needs is a little sign that says "unemployed vietnam veteran - please help".

Like the guy who sits out by the entrance ramp to I-90/94 near my place who uses a collection of signs proclaiming his status as a veteran of Iraq, Desert Storm, Vietnam, *and* Korea (all on different signs of course).